![]() It gives him an outlet for it which is pretty much harmless. Visiting these websites may be his way of accepting and addressing this urge in a way that doesn't risk damaging your relationship and your marriage, because he's not actually doing anything with anyone else. You said that most of the porn he visits is straight, which suggests that, even in his porn habits, he's mostly straight. My guess, most likely, is that your husband acknowledges he's got a hint of this, he's turned on by the idea of gay sex, and he's addressing this urge by visiting gay websites. Of course, the other variable is what anyone does about that streak, which could lie anywhere between ignoring it and suppressing it, acknowledging its existence but not following it at all, viewing porn, having affairs, leading a dual life, whatever. So for your husband to be curious about homosexual sex certainly does not make him wierd or unusual. I think most people (straight or gay) probably have a hint of the other in them - like they're not 100% one thing, but maybe 80-95% one thing with a little of the other, and then there are those who are truly bi-sexual and are right in the middle. I love him to bits and have been married over 20 years with 3 children but I feel now that I don't know him as well as I thought. Please feel free to ask me any questions. As I've tried twice already to talk to him about it and he's denied it point blank I don't know what else to do. I've seen no evidence of him contacting other gay men and it seems it is purely voyeuristic. Is he bisexual but too afraid to tell me, is he too afraid to admit him to himself. What concerns me though is why is he watching men with men - oh and he also goes on photography sites and searches for gay pictures. ![]() He also watches a lot of anal sex - now whatever floats your boat, not my cup of tea. I can see exactly what he's been watching and for how long. Then about 4 months ago there was a change in pattern, he was looking at gay porn again. I began to relax and considered removing the programme. For a long while he was just visiting what are "normal" porn sites - you know man and woman, plain old ordinary sex. Now some of you may disagree with my next move but I needed to be sure of my facts so I installed a web programme that recorded everything that went on. I wasn't sure and therefore didn't feel I could challenge him further. When I challenged him about it he insisted that he hadn't been looking but that he'd been flicking through a porn site and that he hadn't actually viewed them. There were so many "hits" it was obvious it wasn't a one off curiosity stop and I also realised that perhaps what I'd found 6 months previous was not my son afterall but my husband and he'd let me think it was our son. That was until I saw that a lot of the links were to gay porn. I was a little annoyed I admit but I've always been open minded when it comes to porn. 6 months later I was looking through the history on our computer to find a link I had gone on a few days previously and came across a page of links to a porn site and the date and time showed that it couldn't be my son. ![]() I didn't come across anymore until 6 months later. I told my husband about it and he agreed with me that perhaps it was just curiosity of our son. My first reaction was that maybe it was my eldest son being curious (he was about 17 at the time) so I deleted it. About 18 months ago I came across a gay porn video (2 men having intercourse). I apologise in advance if my story is long but I want to try and get all the facts across. This is a diffiuclt question because we all have different ideas on what is "normal" when it comes to sex etc but I feel very confused and just want to talk to someone about this. Hi I hope you don't mind me posting on here but I thought that maybe a man's perspective on this is what is needed as I'm at a complete loss.
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